Last Thursday I was trying to practice for the special Joe and I were scheduled to do at church, and I thought to myself, "I can't do this. I am going to have to postpone it to another Sunday." But, deep inside my heart I could feel the Lord prodding me to go on, to keep it as planned, and trust in Him to do the rest. When I had first looked at my music to figure out what we would sing, nothing seemed to feel right, until I found my copy of 'Lord of My Heart' and suddenly I knew that was what we were supposed to sing. It had the flute music with it so I thought I could play along as well as sing in between the flute parts. It sounded good at the time, but then the trial came up with my arm and I began to doubt. Never doubt what God has laid upon your heart. He always has a way of bringing it back to your heart and mind when it is in His will. He has a greater purpose and plan, and will keep nudging you to follow it no matter how hard it may seem at the time.
So, we kept our schedule. When I woke up Sunday morning, I found I could raise my arm a few inches, which was a huge improvement from not being able to move it at all the day before. I was encouraged and hope was restored. God was taking care of me all in His perfect time. We did our song that morning, and God blessed it. (I am hoping Joe can give me the audio copy of it so I can post it on here so you all can listen to it.) Pastor even asked us to sing it that evening, which meant he had enjoyed it too. It's always a good sign when you are asked to do it again. I felt at peace, knowing that we had done what God had wanted us to and He rewarded our efforts.
Monday rolled around, which we had off from school due to the holiday, and when I woke up I found I could raise my arm up over my head. It was so much improved! God gave me my answer to prayer and it was a wonderful birthday gift. I cried as I thanked Him for His love and mercy, something I felt I did not deserve. I need Him so much in my life, and I do not know where I would be without Him. The truth is I need Him to live my life, but He does not need me. He simply loves me. The only thing He needs from me is to follow Him, love Him, trust Him, and obey Him. When I do this I am standing in His way, meaning I am on the path that He wants me to be on, and He will bless me as I walk down the road He has chosen. No matter how tough it gets, He is there holding my hand, whispering in my ear that He has it all under control, and through my painful experiences He is shaping and molding me into something beautiful. So, no matter how hard it may get, I want to always be right there in God's way.